now, before we begin. the film log is specifically for movies/films i am watching for the first time. i have the discussion hidden, so fair warning if you decide to unhide any of that. this will most likely be older releases versus a lot of new things. i grew up in a fairly media-restricted household due to some puritanical views my parents held. i was not allowed to watch a lot of different things- sometimes for very trivial reasons- such as the prescence of magic or "witchcraft" in kids media or because the main character was deemed too outspoken or rebellious towards authority figures- so any excessive violence or sexual themes were off the table. that has left a lot of holes in my viewing of popular media. of course, when i spent time at other kids' houses i was able to watch things my parents would not have usually allowed. but this was still just a rare occurrance and was not particularly supplemental.
another thing is that because of sensory issues (as well as skyrocketing prices) i hardly ever make it to the movie theater. i'm not entirely sure why but movie theaters give me a *literal* headache. i think it is the bright lights of the big screen and the loud volumes. i only see movies in the theater if i consider it especially worth it. i have to premptively pop a couple ibuprofen and make sure i bring my earplugs with me so i can actually enjoy myself.
all that being said, i tend to be a consistent re-watcher. i have comfort movies/shows that i gladly revisit rather than watch something new. i also have a few silly, self-imposed things that i refuse to watch yet because i am saving them. for what exactly? idk. i am convinced that they are a time investment i either can't make yet or i am saving them for when it simply feels right to watch them because i know based on the premise i will likely be obsessed and it will become an all-consumng pillar of my personality and i am savoring whatever the current pillar of my personality is and i just am not at a place where i feel i can handle it all. i'm aware that doesn't make sense but it makes sense to me. i have demand avoidance tendencies.
2026 goal: 10 new movies 
progress as of april 2026: 2/10
currently watching: LOST (again)
watched March 2026
4/5
thoughts
i actually sat my ass in the theater for this one!! i had recently finished reading the book earlier in the month, just in time. my friend molly had lent me the book with the intention that we would go see the film together and that is just what we did. and what a treat it was to have the book so fresh in my mind for the time of the film release, i feel like that type of timing just doesn't happen often. there were many changes made from the book, but i felt like most of them were done to the benefit of the viewers. while i did really enjoy the way the math and science were integrated into the book, i do realize that in film format including all of those details would have been too involved. i think the ratio of the present with glimpses into the past were well-balanced. the level and frequency of humor to break up the more serious moments was perfect. i am a little curious as to why the detail of grace being a candidate because he also possesses the genetic coma-resistance was left out. and i feel like they did not portray just how naturally intelligent rocky is. but i did feel they preserved rocky and grace's friendship in a very sweet way that is book-accurate (and one of the best parts of the whole story imo)
obviously with the importance of light and color to the story that gave the directors a great opportunity to really showcase light in the film and i feel like they did so in some nice subtle ways (the rainbows in the background of his classroom parallelling his experience inside rocky's ship, red being a color of importance or signaling danger as it is the color of the petrova line, etc.) a detail i haven't seen anyone talk about yet and i am wondering what the significance of is the inclusion of fox imagery. that isn't anywhere to be found in the book, but in the film, grace seems to have a fondness for foxes. during his initial vodka binge after being awakened from the coma to find his crewmates dead, he can be seen wearing a fox mask. he is often seen in the flashbacks wearing a grandpa sweater featuring foxes, and his keys have a fox keychain on them. this detail bothered me a bit so i tried doing some research. foxes have long been a symbol in mythology for being cunning, resourceful creatures- often resorting to manipulative tactics to meet their needs and survive. i can see a potential metaphor involving grace's personality in there. he's obviously extremely clever and capable, which is why stratt recruits him- but when cornered, he tries to run away from the mission as he is afraid to die. i also thought that maybe it is just another inclusion of color as language- since foxes are red. stratt happens to be portrayed as having red hair so maybe it is another way to signal his complex relationship to her. beyond that, i did find that a group of foxes is sometimes referred to as an 'earth' but that just seems too simple an explanation.
all around a very enjoyable experience that i would absolutely rewatch!! ALSO MILES FROM LOST was casted as Commander Yao (all roads lead back to LOST for me)
(1995)
watched January 2026
3/5
thoughts
got this on DVD for a couple bucks at the thrift store and invited my friend AJ over to watch it. i knew going into it that i was going to enjoy the costuming/set design and aesthetic more than anything and i was definitely correct. the story did not feel an ounce realistic but that's okay, i still found it enjoyable for what it was. i *love* 90s weirdo matthew lillard. i am inspired to watch everything he's ever been in tbh. idk if it is gender envy or like i would smooch him, but it's definitely something. he gets 5 stars.